What is conservative anymore?

I am still so appaled how a conservative candidate can call himself just that and continue to advocate a multi-trillion dollar war. Am I fucking nuts to think this way? What is conservative anymore? Here, let me make this easier on you - here are several positions of the new Conservative:

1. Advocates trillion dollar perpetual war in the name of safety.
2. Votes yes on federally funded stem cell research.
3. Continue to spend billions on the war on drugs
4. Criticize prok barrel spending, yet vote for the spending
5. Continue useless embargos with other nations and add additional requirements to "free trade agreements"
6. For government funded election campaigns
7. Provide amnesty to illegal immigrants
8. Voting no on tax cuts

There, the modern conservative in a snapshot, I'm sick again - good day.